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Saturday, January 30, 2010

Hmms.~ I'm not gonna blog much today.
Having slight headache & feeling kinda restless.
BeN laogong is still sick. *sighs*
I'm really worried about him.
I really wish that i can be there right now for him.
*sighs*
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Note to BeN laogong :
You can't think that the answers exist somewhere
The answers only exist inside you
You're cool
Just the way you are,
Wth your honest feelings and everything
It's definitely love
Right now, with these overflowing feelings and everything

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Friday, January 29, 2010

Tired, tired, tired. x.x
Today was the last day for me to practice driving.
MONDAY ! Driving test. *faints*
I'm very scared that I might fail. *sighs*
*prays hard* Hopefully I'll pass.

Didn't get to text much with BeN laogong today.
I miss BeN laogong l0ts l0ts l0ts ! ];
Then, just now when he texted me, he told me that his fever came back !
38.4 degree !
*screams !* BeN laogong has been having fever for A WEEK now. ];
Sad die me.
I hope that he'll get well real soon.
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Note to BeN laogong :
I can’t just say anything else other special words,
Those warm, sweet words I wanna say to you every day,
Other than 'I love you' and 'I miss you',
I wanted to at least tell you
In ordinary words, in life-sized words
It’s quicker to hold you tight
I’m easily embarrassed
So it’s the best I can do
I don’t want those scripted words
I’ve really and truly fallen in love with you
I’ll silently hold you
So you can become happy here in my arms

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Thursday, January 28, 2010

After waiting for more than a day without a single message from BeN laogong, finally this afternoon he texted me.
I was very happy when he texted me.
But, I found out that he was sent to the sick bay.
]; ! Not a good thing.
I was worried sick about him.
I miss BeN laogong so much.
When he didnt text me at all for the whole day yesterday.
I kept thinking so many nonsense which made me so upset.
Im alright now though, after BeN laogong texted me. ;]
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Note to BeN laogong :
When you’ve been hurt
And when you blame yourself
I’ll hold you tightly
And whisper in your ear
“Is anyone perfect? Is life ever perfect?”
People don’t always do things they can be proud of
You’ve got to embrace it all,
So come on,
Look up and look at me.

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Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Note to BeN laogong :
My honey, grab my arm
And follow me into my dream
There’ll be tears and laughter
I won’t say you should believe me right away
But just come a little closer and stand by me

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Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Today my mood was extremely crappy.
I was very emo, pissed, frustrated, upset, depressed, screwed & whatever negative emotions there is.
BeN laogong was sick !
He refused to go to see the medical officer for check up.
He has fever around 4 days already ! ];
To make things worse, he fainted when he was marching.
~!@#$%^&*()_+ ! I snapped. ._.
But after texting BeN laogong for sometime i calmed down.
Anyway, this morning i was so screw up during my driving lesson. =.=
& Im gonna have driving test on Monday.
Im wondering if im gonna pass... *sighs*
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Note to BeN laogong :
There’s something much,
Much more important
Than the millionth “I love you”
I’ll silently hold you
So you can become happy here in my arms
Hold me tight
You are always making me happy.

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Monday, January 25, 2010

This morning BeN laogong texted me saying that he isnt feeling well. ];
Im really worried about him.
He cant rest even though hes so sick. ]; !
Urgh ! Why cant i be there for him ? *sighs*
I feel that im such a hopeless person. ];
Even though he just booked in for a day, im already missing him very much !
It's like I havent been able to talk to him much for ages !

Note to Cheryl AiAi :
AiAi ! Cannot cry without telling me !
Everything which make you feel sad/upset/angry/pissed/wanna cry MUST tell me.
If you dont, at night ill haunt you !
Dont let you sleep.
Even if its in the middle of the night, its 0kay to call/text me.
My phone is always on derhs.
I'll confirm reply you derhs, kay?
MUST tell me all your problems h0rhs.
Dont needa keep them to yourself which burden you.
We'll carry your burden together.
Loves AiAi.
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Note to BeN laogong :
Snow scatters into the night sky,
Cuddling together,
We looked up at it.
The warmth of our joined hands was so tender.
The faint old blue between the clouds is disappearing,
But that promise of ours should continue towards eternity.
Being close to you,
That alone was what made me happy.
Before I knew it,
Everything swelled up without realizing that this reality was better than my dream.
No matter when,
No matter where,
Just firmly and strongly hold me close to you.
Even if my passion is dyed with the ordinary…
These feelings for you are everything.
I believe nothing can end them,
I’m always looking at you.

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Sunday, January 24, 2010

Today is Sunday again... *sighs*
Sad die me. ];
BeN laogong gonna book in soon. ]; ]; ];
Im gonna miss him very very very much.
*sighs* How great will it be if im there to send him off...
Im sure ill feel a slightly better.
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Note to BeN laogong :
Walking along the cherry trees road with you
The wind is cold, but I still feel warm
Because you are by my side
Today is the day to take one step,
Tomorrow will be different
The time where we are together was very precious to me.
You're standing on the road,
Stopping by to look up in the sky
Cover of serenity is like the wind
1 second is in fact much time
When you're here by my side.

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Friday, January 22, 2010

Note to BeN laogong :
I didn’t believe in love
Because I can’t see it
That’s what I’ve been telling myself up to this point
Far, far away, I simply buried it
But now you came into my life
I touch your hand and your heart
Just one second stretches into eternity like magic
You cry, then smile
My heart was missing a piece,
Look,
It begins to tremble
Now my ordinary days are colored with love
I had been searching for you from the start

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Thursday, January 21, 2010

Note to BeN laogong :
I was so happy to meet you,
To be able to with you,
To love you,
To stand by your side,
So happy, really happy,
You've brought so much happiness into my life.

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Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Note to Cheryl AiAi :
Dont be upset.
Anything can tell me derhs.
My phone will be on for 24/7.
If anything, just call/text me, alright?
I'll be there for you when you need me.
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Note to BeN laogong :
The same breeze,
The same scenery
We always feel it
Even though I feel awkward,
We can slowly walk straight ahead
You are hiding the other side of your smile
Tears start to appear and I stretched out my hand
Be strong,
It's okay to spill it out
Because I'm by your side
Always be together,
I want to send you this warmth
You're not alone anymore
I'll be always by your side
Don't ever forget that

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Monday, January 18, 2010

Morning went to watch movie with my mum.
Very long never watch movie lerhs. ;x !
My mum said tomorrow still wanna watch since there are still a l0t of movies which she wanna watch.
Today i got up late around 10.30. ;x !
The driving school called me saying that tomorrow's class is moved to Wednesday.
Sian die me. ];
Wednesday BeN laogong will be home from Ns sia. Then i have to go for driving class.
Tsk ! ];
I miss BeN laogong l0ts l0ts l0ts !
]; ]; ];
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Note to BeN laogong :
You stumble and lose your dreams
You can't escape from these worries
You can always come and talk to me
And we'll search for the answers
You gave me the light
So brilliant
By meeting, and touching
It was no coincidence
These feelings I want to tell you are overflowing
With just that
This world of mine has changed colour

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Sunday, January 17, 2010

BeN laogong gonna book in soon. ];
Sad die me.
I miss him a l0t a l0t a l0t !
*sighs* ];
I'll have to wait until next Friday again. ]; ]; ];
I want my BeN laogonggg ! *wails !*
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Note to BeN laogong :
You looked down and gave out a sigh
Looks like you're about to break down in front of me
You can talk to me about anything
We'll share the burden together
I can become the place for you to come back to
Whenever
Whether it's the past or the future,
I'll embrace you
Just believe it

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Friday, January 15, 2010

Note to BeN laogong :
Tears gone down my cheeks like prayers
Don't hide your "weaknesses"
And accept your "gentleness"
You make me forget about even breathing
I found the sky within your eyes
The sun is the only thing that shines, what are you searching for?
The day that I made a vow, staring into the mirror
I could definitely see you in it
If I could have one wish,
I'll use that wish to stay by your side forever.

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Thursday, January 14, 2010

Note to BeN laogong :
You’re fine the way you are
Overflowing words are also fine
Crying, smiling, I want to tell you
Let’s join our hearts together forever
I know you know I feel your heart
You know I know you feel my heart

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Wednesday, January 13, 2010

]; ]; ];
Im depressed.
I want my BeN laogong !
Why cant it be Friday today?
HURRY UP ALREADY ! *cries*
I miss BeN laogong very very very much.
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Note to BeN laogong :
I wish you’ll stay by my side forever
I’ll say it time after time,
I love you
Sorry for giving you trouble
And being bratty and selfish again
Getting jealous and fighting
And crying
When I do that, you smile
And hold my hand tight
I can say anything to you; you mean so much to me
Your tenderness makes me so happy
That I allows me to be myself
I’ll stay by your side
From now until forever
No matter what happens, I want to protect you
In your arms, your warmth
Your smile, it’s so warm
I trust you,
I love you
I want us to keep supporting each other

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Tuesday, January 12, 2010

*sighs*
]; ]; ];
I miss BeN laogong a l0t a l0t a l0t.
I almost missed the chance to text him just now.
His phone battery manage to survive a little while.
I WANT IT TO BE FRIDAY SOONNN. *wails*
I need my BeN laogong. ];
*cries*
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Note to BeN laogong :
Sleepless nights thinking of you
Whispering your name again
It is so painful
And I cant stop reading your messages
I miss you every second
I'll go out at midnight to see you,
Do you feel the same?
Im afraid to be too selfish
Fall in love does not need anything
All I need is you,
You are precious to me
Keep your hands connected with me forever
And do not end our love
The constellations of winter and the summer sunsets
I wanna look at them with you forever

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Monday, January 11, 2010

Note to BeN laogong :
All you do is give to me,
All the time, every day when I’m about to cry,
I’m so happy
I’ve realised that I’m not alone
I close my eyes, and right away you make it all overflow
The tracks of my life so far
Along with your smiles that I can’t live without
Sometimes I didn’t understand and gave you trouble
But you took me seriously
I’ll say the words “I love you”
From the bottom of my heart, to your heart
Facing a future
That was far away, too far away
Things looked hopeless and I wanted to give up
Even then, you were by my side
Running down a long road
Now I’ve gotten just a little stronger
Because of your voice guiding me
I’ve been able to have faith and come this far
It’s time for something to change
Coming out of my shell,
You taught me the meaning of your love
Over time it has brought colours to my life
That day you softly whispered to me “You’ve made your dream come true”

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Hmms...~
Today chatted with AiAi, monkey & my audi jie.
Morning BeN laogong texted me.
Hes sick. ]; ]; ];
Then waited for his message until evening.
I was very happy when he text me. ;]
I miss him l0ts l0ts l0ts !
BeN laogong's phone battery died !
Sad die me.
I have to wait until Friday night then he'll be able to contact me again. ];
Nevermind ! I shall wait patiently. ;/
Urgh... !
Im hungry. >< !
But im lazy to cook. ]; !
Tsk. >< Note to AiAi :
AiAi must make sure Risa dont have anymore ticks w0rhs.
Dont get the virus.
Take care of yourself.
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Note to BeN laogong :
I wanna see you right now, right now
And I say those words
If I can be spoiled, is that good?
I wanna see you right now, right now
As long as you stay with me,
I'll be happy
Together, we'll be happy

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Saturday, January 9, 2010

Yesterday came back from Thailand.
I was so freaking sick yesterday !
Ugh !
Yesterday morning until afternoon i kept going to the toilet until i lost count.
I vomitted dont know how many times. x.x !
So xinku.
Then at night go fever. ];
But at least im feeling better now.
I was so happy that i got to text with BeN laogong again.
Dumb connection, cant text BeN laogong when i was in Thailand. ];
Sad die me.
I miss BeN laogong l0ts l0ts l0ts !
This morning chatted with Cheryl AiAi & monkey for awhile.
Note to AiAi :
I miss you, AiAi !
AiAi is sick ugh. Must take care w0rhs !
&&& If aiai is sick, MUST tell me.
Cannot hide anything from me w0rhs. ~<3
I'll be there for you derhs.
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Note to BeN laogong :
The red rose on my hair is the color of passion
I saw you, you have such a passionate look
My heart leaps when i look at you
This episode stains me with the colours
Of a time that will never come again
I’ll play my guitar, capturing this burning love
It’ll surely spin a love
Traveller, if your scars are aching
Sleep on my chest
I’ll cover you with my love
And shine only on you
Like the moon tonight

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Sunday, January 3, 2010

]; ]; ];
BeN laogong gonna go NS tomorrow.
Sad die me.
Im gonna miss my BeN laogong l0ts l0ts l0ts !
*sighs*
BeN laogong, I love you l0ts l0ts l0ts.
I LOVE YOU, BeN laogong. I LOVE LOVE LOVE love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love lovelove love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love BeN Laogong !
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Note to BeN laogong :
On the days when somehow everything goes wrong with bad timing
And I almost hate myself
I lose composure
And can hardly be kind to others
And I get more depressed
In such times
You are always by my side
You are embarrassingly positive
And walk on leading me by the hand
You are always by my side
What you offered straight to me
With a smile for the last time
Was just so beautiful
That I gave way to tears
Surely, that day
The two of us touched love
We sought for each other
Lost ourselves at times
And found each other at last
So whatever result may be waiting for us
Trust me, my love
You live within me
I'll never say good-bye to you

Closer than anyone else
You know me much more than I do
There are also the days
When everything goes so well somehow
That I'm left speechless
And I remember your profile
When you cried together with me
As if it had been your own matter
Please be my side forever
When I look up, I see your smile
That hasn't changed in years
Please be my side forever
Yes, closer than anyone else
I know you much more than you do

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Saturday, January 2, 2010

Note to BeN laogong :
Wrapped in the tenderness of the night
I hide my dizzying love
As I walk along I follow with my eyes
The back I love so much
Don’t worry anymore
About those stubborn words
My lips are getting wet
As the rain covers them
I’m getting more attracted to you by the second
If we find a sparkling shooting star
Then it must surely be an angel of love descending
I want you to tell me how you feel right now
A crazy love is beginning
Being with you is the best, isn’t it?
Dusk is gently falling
I gaze at your rose-tinged smile
I want to light a fire within you
Before darkness falls
Don’t tease me anymore
I’m reaching my limit
As you gently embrace me
I can see the night sky over your shoulder
The world has surely fallen in love with us
And the angels of love are smiling down on us in the starry night
A crazy love is beginning
Nobody can stop us
I can’t sleep, let’s go out
Let’s go and look for a shining star
The tiny rips will disappear
We’re walking past the street corner
I’ve even seen in my dreams
Passing people are looking at us two lovers
With dazzled expressions
You’re more wonderful now than any other day
Then we don’t need to count the things we’ve lost
We’ll get through countless nights
Don’t let go of my hand
No matter what kind of tomorrow comes
I’m getting more attracted to you by the second
If we’ve seen a sparkling shooting star
Then the world has surely fallen in love with us

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Friday, January 1, 2010

Note to BeN Laogong :
Can you see? Things around us are certainly changing.
But here remains the unchanged thing,
I've come to believe so,
Because you taught it to me.
Everyone walks on,
To meet just one person some day.
I must have walked on,
To meet you.
Let's go along together,
Looking at the same scenery,
Whatever incidents may be to come,
Don't forget,
I will always be by your side.
Though I can do nothing else.
On the days of tears and on the days of smile,
I will be by your side,
If I'm reborn some day,
I will surely find you,
And I will walk on again,
To meet you.

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